There Is A Longing

Today is the third Sunday of Advent. Advent is the time in which we take special care to consider the first coming of Christ Jesus, as well as prepare our hearts and minds for His promised second Coming. Some of the questions I like to meditate upon are Who Is Jesus The Christ? Who Do I say He Is? What does His first Coming mean to me? How has the awakening of the Holy Spirit within me changed my life? Am I using the gifts and talents bestowed upon me by the Holy Spirit to help a hurting world? For what am I grateful? How have I experienced God's healing power in my life - mind, body, soul and spirit? Do I live out Jesus' desire for me to offer mercy, even more than sacrifice? Does the promised second Coming of Christ encourage me or challenge me? Or both? To close, I would like to share with you the words of my very favorite hymn, "There Is A Longing." Our church's music director usually reserves this song for Advent. I hope that the words will touch your heart in a meaningful way like they do mine. You can find the words to the song in the post below.

There Is A Longing - Lyrics

"There Is A Longing" by Anne Quigley

Refrain:

There is a longing in our hearts, O Lord,
for you to reveal yourself to us.
There is a longing in our hearts for love
we only find in you, our God.

Verse 1:
For justice, for freedom, for mercy:
hear our prayer.
In sorrow, in grief:
be near, hear our prayer, O God.

Refrain

Verse 2:
For wisdom, for courage, for comfort:
hear our prayer.
In weakness, in fear:
be near, hear our prayer, O God.

Refrain

Verse 3:
For healing, for wholeness, for new life:
hear our prayer.
In sickness, in death:
be near, hear our prayer, O God.

Refrain

Verse 4:
Lord save us, take pity, light in our
darkness.
We call you, we wait:
be near, hear our prayer, O God.


Refrain

The Vision - Part III

A week after the Heaven experience, I was watching Father John Corapi on EWTN. He began the program by saying that he would be talking about Mary, mother of Jesus. Normally, I would have turned the program off. Though I had already entered the Catholic Church at this point, I believed that Catholics were idolatrous in their love for Mary. However, because of my experience, I decided to keep the program on. Father Corapi immediately began by saying, "You know how at the end of the 'Hail Mary' we say 'pray for us, now and at the hour of our death?' " Well, I heard very little of what Father Corapi said after that, because in that moment, I became keenly aware that Mary had been praying for me and the troubles I was having with my heart. I had said the 'Hail Mary' so many times in my life and had no real understanding that I had been asking her to pray for me. But, there she was that evening praying for ME!

The next Sunday, I told my priest what had happened. He laughed and said to me, "You had a vision of Mary." He proceeded to ask me what the date was on which the "vision" had occured. I had no idea. At that point, I didn't even know what a "Mary Vision" was, and I certainly didn't know that she often appears on special dates.

That vision brought so much comfort to my sister and me after our mother died only 6 months later. I do not have a death wish, and I am very grateful for the life that has been given to me. But, I no longer have any fear of death at all. God has revealed to me that what I saw in the "vision" is nothing compared to what is wating for us all. Still, I want to raise my children and do all of the things that I enjoy doing most, especially write, ski, and travel.

About a year and a half ago, I collapsed after my heart had become very weak due to a slew of other health issues. Before the doctors even knew what was wrong with me, I asked God to please tell me why I had collapsed and why I was having so many other problems. The Holy Spirit said to me Why was Mary praying for you? Ask her to pray for you now. Of course, I knew that God was referring back to the vision and the heart palpitation. At that point, I realized that it had been my heart that had caused my collapse and the seizures that followed. Four months of doctors appointments confirmed God's Words.

Mary was the first Christian, the first one to believe that our Messiah had come. No matter your faith, I encourage you to ask Mary to pray for you, too. As Sacred Scripture tells us, Jesus' first Miracle was performed at the request of his mother at the Wedding at Cana (Gospel according to St. John 2:1-11). It is important to note that the emphasis is not on Mary. She always points back to her Son. In Mary's own words, we are to "do whatever He tells you" (John 2:5). We don't pray to Mary or those in Heaven. We ask them to pray for us, just like we would ask a friend to pray for us. We are blessed to have such "a great cloud of witnesses" (Hebrews 12:1) to ask to intercede on our behalf... those who are already in the full presence of God.

The Vision - Part II

It happened one night during the summer of 2005. I don’t remember what day or month. At the time, I had no idea that it could have some significance. I woke up in the middle of the night with a shooting pain in my chest. A heart palpitation shot me straight up in bed into a sitting position. I sat on the edge of the bed for a few seconds taking a few slow, deep breaths. I was afraid. When the pain subsided and I had caught my breath, I laid back down and closed my eyes. What came next was a most wonderful experience.

As soon as my eyes were closed, I saw a tall, metal gate. Then, I noticed three little children - two girls and a boy - standing on the other side of the gate peering through the bars at me. Everything, including the children, was in a sepia color. The children had sweet, kind faces. They appeared to be watching me to see what I would do.

Slowly, the gate doors began to open. As they did, a bright, bright, white, white light emerged. As the gate doors continued to open, the light became all encompassing. The light was whiter than anything I could ever describe or imagine. It did not, however, have a harsh glare to it. It was beautiful! How a bright, white light could be beautiful, I can’t even begin to explain. A sense of sheer peace and joy filled me like I had never before experienced nor have since.

In the distance, an image began to appear. It was a woman. As the white light made way for other images, the “ground area” continued to remain white. Not like a cloud, not like a floor. Just WHITE. Then I could see that a white gazebo had formed around the woman. Flowers began to surround the gazebo… pink, purple, blue, green and yellow. They were the brightest, most vibrant colors that I have ever seen. They were absolutely beautiful! The woman was dressed in a long white gown, and a long, blue veil covered her head. She was looking down. By no effort of my own, I began moving closer to her. I was not walking, floating, or flying. I was just “moving” slowly toward her. I had no control over my own movement. As I was moving forward, I began to sense that maybe I had died. I opened my eyes.

I was still lying in my bed in my bedroom. I was definitely awake, and I was definitely not dead. I closed my eyes and to my surprise, everything was still there exactly the way it was before I opened my eyes. Everything was beautiful, serene, and peaceful. The woman was so beautiful. The white light surrounding everything was beautiful beyond words. I was filled with so much joy, love and peace. Strangely, I knew that I had a choice to stay or go. But surely I wasn’t dead. I didn’t understand. I didn’t want to leave. “What about my children?” I thought. It was so peaceful and beautiful – I really did not want to leave. How could I leave this? “But what about my children?” I kept thinking. Slowly, I began to move away from the gazebo, the woman, and the beautiful flowers. It wasn’t because I was walking away. I was still facing her. I was just moving backwards in the same manner in which I had arrived. I opened my eyes. I was still in my bedroom. I closed my eyes once again. Then, the image of the woman, the garden and the bright, white light were replaced by the closing gate. The gate slowly faded away.

I got up and went to the bathroom, overwhelmed by the whole experience. I couldn’t believe how much joy, peace, and love I had felt in those moments. When I returned to bed, I felt sad that it had all ended. But I knew, without a doubt, that I would be there again. I had been given a great privilege and gift of seeing a tiny piece of Heaven, as well as Mary, the mother of Jesus.

The Vision - Part I

Tomorrow is the Feast of the Immaculate Conception - a day which honors (not worships) Mary, most blessed mother of Jesus. Why honor Mary? We are called to honor our own mothers and fathers. How much more the mother of Jesus? Mary's "Yes" was significant in bringing Jesus the Christ into the world. Her example of full trust in God our Father, despite very real dangers, is such an inspiration to me. Tomorrow, I am going to share an experience that I had a little over three years ago. I have shared this story with very few people; however, I realize that by not sharing it more, I am being selfish in a way. And, I am not trusting God to keep me safe from criticism from others. Those who have heard the story have told me that it gives them much hope. My wish is that you will find some inspiration from hearing it, too. I will preface the story with a note that I was not raised Catholic. I did, however, have a very close friend who taught me the "Hail Mary" and "Our Father" when I was a child. Though I didn't understand the words, I said the prayers anyway, especially when I was struggling in college (even though I was a self-professed atheist). And, at the time of the experience, I was struggling with the Catholic teachings about Mary. I had asked God a few months before to help me understand her. God answered that prayer in a life-changing way! (NOTE: The Feast of the Immaculate Conception does not memorialize Mary's conception of Jesus, rather Mary's being conceived herself without sin. I can't say that I fully understand this. It is one of those things I put in the "trust" column.)

Santa Claus

Today, the Feast of St. Nicholas, we honor the fourth century Bishop of Myra. "Perhaps the best-known story about Nicholas concerns his charity toward a poor man who was unable to provide dowries for his three daughters of marriageable age. Rather than see them forced into prostitution, Nicholas secretly tossed a bag of gold through the poor man's window on three separate occasions, thus enabling the daughters to be married. Over the centuries, this particular legend evolved into the custom of gift-giving on the saint's feast day. In the English-speaking countries, St. Nicholas became, by a twist of the tongue, Santa Claus... further expanding the example of generosity portrayed by this holy bishop" (American Catholic.org). May our own charity be a sign to the world of the great gift of Love given to us by our Father in Heaven... Jesus, the Christ, our Lord.

The Gift

I've been hearing from God in a very personal way for many years now. I'm still very humbled that such a gift has been bestowed upon me. As someone who enjoys writing, I've felt the call to write for God. The Holy Spirit has led me to a few of the projects on which I am working. However, when I asked God specifically what He wants me to do with the gift of "hearing" His Voice, I was quite surprised by His answer: I just want you to tell people that I love them. How simple, yet difficult at the same time. "God loves you!" How hard can it be to tell a person that? Sometimes it is very, very easy. Some people know God in a very personal way and can't hear the words enough. But there are also those whose eyes, ears and hearts the Holy Spirit has not yet opened, who do not recognize God's presence in the world. I understand... I was once there, too. Like a priest once said to me, "Young lady, you need to meet people where they are." I have found that often times the best way to tell people that God loves them is by extending the love of Christ to them through caring, understanding words and acts of service. We can't beat people over the head with our Bibles, tracts, and condemnation. It never worked on me. I was literally loved to the Trinity. It was by witnessing others' joy and hope, despite their circumstances, that made me want what they had. Patience and understanding toward me as I asked questions is what helped me to take the leap of faith needed. Through my writings, I am trying to do what God has asked of me... to tell people that God loves them. So, by the way, in case you don't know it or haven't heard it for a long time... I am here to tell you that God loves you! Peace.